It’s not about having nothing. It’s about only keeping what is worth having. I’m actually a bit of a hoarder and extremely nostalgic myself. I also strive to be a minimalist, as I don’t like clutter and junk. It’s complicated, I know. To help fix this problem even further, I just don’t ask for things that I won’t use.
Inspired by my older sister, this is why I made a wishlist of everything I’ll ever want. I’ve posted this list on my website and it truly includes everything; a private jet, a yacht, a beach house, etc. When I buy something for myself, it’s almost always something from this list. I’ll update it whenever I need to cross something off. I find myself rarely adding anything new. This limits me from spontaneously binge spending on random things I don’t need.
I finally found my own version of the Steve Jobs Uniform. He kept it simple; black turtleneck, blue jeans, and a pair of sneakers. While I haven’t hit this level of simplicity, I’ve definitely found my favorite version of things.
I’ll pick up just about any pair of aviator style sunglasses, as long as they’re under $20. While I try to treat them with care, I end up breaking several pair every summer. For nearly all of my shirts and hoodies, I like Bella + Canvas. There is the #3001 t-shirts, #3501 long sleeve, #3719 pullover hoodie, and the #3939 zip hoodie. I typically wear RSQ jeans or chinos from Tilly’s or just about any pair of cargo shorts that cost about $20.
For socks, it’s either the Nike SX6898-100 (white, no show) or the SX6899-010 (black, ankle). I picked Nike hoping they won’t change these around too much. I can’t stand wasting away my life sorting socks. I just donated what I had and bought 12 pair of each kind. There are better things in life than wasting time sorting socks. Finally, I’ve gotten rid of most of my shoes. I have one pair of steal-toe boots and one pair of slip-resistant (TredSafe) work shoes. What is left is predominately Vans or Converse.
]]>I believe that there are 5 essentials in any relationship. This is my personal opinion. I’ve noticed that people who lack these essentials have the tendency to fight more often and eventually part ways. While there are many factors involved, these are my top 5. I truly believe every relationship, without these 5 principles, will ultimately fail. Everything on this list is two-dimensional. You should expect and provide value throughout all these 5 principles. Apply this to your relationship; your friends, family, and significant other.
Above all, you produce the most amount of smiles and the least amount of tears. You make them happier and laugh more than anyone else in their life. You also create the least amount of frustration in their life compared to everyone else. You’re the solution, not the problem; the cure, not a disease.
I wouldn't want to go as far and say “I am responsible for their happiness”. I think we are all responsible for our own happiness. However, I know I play a significant role. I know that I would rather be a source of smiles than tears.
Identify what THEY define as their own success. What are their goals and missions? Prove, not tell, but show them that you want them to achieve their goals. You want them to be successful on their own terms. In some cases, you are more determined and motivated to help them achieve their goals than they are willing to help themself.
Handling stressful situations together. Don’t say things out of anger. Don’t be passive-aggressive. Explain your feelings and seek to understand their feelings before you doubt them. Ask questions to understand, not to undermine.
If you ask the right questions, you give them the opportunity to define their feelings. If their feelings are truly invalid, this gives them the opportunity to make that call. That's their call to make, not your's. They needs to define their emotion and digest it. All the while, you’re supporting them emotionally by simply seeking to understand.
As I said before, this is 2-dimensional. For example, I might get frustrated for no reason. With the help of my relationships, I will define what is going on. Then, I come to the conclusion that my feelings are invalid. I just needed to shake it off. My feelings of frustration were real, but pointless. Rather than someone else telling me that I’m “overreacting”, I was able to come to this conclusion myself. There is a big difference.
Talk about money and finances. Set time aside to teach one another about money. Learn together. Schedule time simply to talk about money. Aside from infidelity, financial problems is the main cause for divorce. Ironically, a divorce will also worsen your financial problems. We need money to survive. There are plenty of problems that are far more important than money. Don't waste your time fighting about money.
Forgive and forget. Most problems should not define your relationship. Learn to move on and prevent the problems from happening again. It’s best to wait until the tension has passed. Finding solutions is much easier when everyone can think clearly. A small fight or disagreement is not the definition of your relationship.
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